Today's post is dedicated to women wearing hats on the cover of books. It was not just the Reluctant Cowgirl, this seems to be a common phenomenon. As a (proud) disclaimer, I have not read any of these books and the following opinions are based solely on reading their back covers and my own good skills at assessing a situation.
I am going to skip naming the target audience for each book as they are all a similar audience: nostalgic, christian (usually), accessory and pun loving Romantics.
Hmmmm, gloves, pearl necklaces, old-timey flower print dress, mountains in the background... yet somethings still missing. Needs more hat!!
I am going to skip naming the target audience for each book as they are all a similar audience: nostalgic, christian (usually), accessory and pun loving Romantics.
Hmmmm, gloves, pearl necklaces, old-timey flower print dress, mountains in the background... yet somethings still missing. Needs more hat!!
"Good golly! I forgot to wear my hat and had to have it photoshopped in", mused Lauralee.
Trying to come off as classy, Cara had the good sense to take off her straw hat for the picture and to put on her best 80's prairie dress. But she lost all pretense of refinement when she named her book "Cornhusker Dreams". Are you even trying Cara??
Hey! This post is dedicated to hat wearing women! Okay your puns qualify you for sneaking in. (Bonus: she suffers from memory loss)Here's a real snippet from the back cover:"The long, lean deputy couldn't hide his fascination with the mystery lady he'd discovered. Something about her vulnerability, her wistfulness drew Brady Donovan as no one else ever had. In fact, when she left the hospital, he named her "Lass" and brought her to his family's ranch to finish recuperating..... In the end, would Brady's own heart be lost…or found?"
When I found this next series of books at Winco, I said aloud "jackpot". Get this: these books are Amish Romance Novels, many of which take place in Oregon. Who is their target audience? Correct me if I am wrong, but the Amish do not shop at stores. So this must be for non-Amish readers who want to relive romance through the eyes and life of the Amish. (Jana!)
What? Is he checking me out? It's like that perv is looking right through my hat.
Here is a case where the cover tells the whole story. Typical sweet girl falls for bad-boy sheep farmer. Again, a snippet straight from the back cover:"In Never Far From Home, fifteen-year-old Emma Miller finishes school, starts her own wool business, and is longing for someone to court. When the object of her affection is a handsome English sheep farmer, with a fast truck and modern methods, her deacon father, Simon, knows he has more than the farm alliance to worry about."
And buttons. Don't forget that the handsome English sheep farmer uses buttons-"the devil's fastener". (Colbert's joke.)
Okay, I think I got this down by now. Turn my head to the left, stare at something in the distance while looking wistful but happy, ..no no! Not that happy!..now nod towards others who are also wearing hats.From the back cover:"Jolene Yoder returns to Indiana to teach lip reading and sign language to the newly deaf Amish man Lonnie Hershberger. As she begins falling for Lonnie, Jolene wonders if she'll ever see 'signs' of his love for her.... Who will end up with whom as these cousins face challenges in love and life?"
Cousins?
Two hats for the price of one. This book is a Mennonite romance. So much classier.Why isn't the horse wearing a hat?
Finally, my gift to you:
The Reluctant Gardener
I asked Justin if this hat was hot. No. Not at all.
Remind me never to have my picture taken with a high-wasted apron on again.Why is my arm so beefy?
Has anyone read any of these featured books?
Would anyone read any of these featured books?
Tell me everything.
Better yet, do you have any hat wearing book covers to contribute to my collection?
p.s. I kind of like the Amish, so don't be sending me Amish backlash hate mail.
Remind me never to have my picture taken with a high-wasted apron on again.Why is my arm so beefy?
Has anyone read any of these featured books?
Would anyone read any of these featured books?
Tell me everything.
Better yet, do you have any hat wearing book covers to contribute to my collection?
p.s. I kind of like the Amish, so don't be sending me Amish backlash hate mail.
8 comments:
Oh I'll never tire of reading these posts! Laughing out loud in my pj's as the kids are left to fend for themselves.
Funny thing, I caught one of these out of the corner of my eye (Fields of Grace, I believe) two days ago as I was picking up some tortillas. I immediately thought of you and wonderered if you regularly stood there chuckling to yourself as you stopped to thumb through them with your cart full of kids and groceries.
good post, i lol'ed at '(jana!)' and 'beefy'
Died and went to heaven with this post. Damian kept asking me, as I read, "Mom what is so funny? Mom what is so funny??" all concerned.
I think one of these books should be chosen for a book club. Everyone could read it, pick out the worst (best?) parts and read them aloud to each other with dramatic flair. They could even come with hats and do contests and pose for pictures with their hats for their own someday book cover.
Jana, I like your book club idea. I'll bring it up with mine.
But you don't need "Book club" as an excuse to read one of these tasty books. Just go ahead and read and tell me about it. I know you dying to!
Hilarious post Alisha. This could be one of your trademarks.
No joke, I read an amish romance bought straight from the racks of Win-CO. My friend sent it to me for my birthday a couple years ago. I didn't know if it was a joke and when I asked her about it she went on and on about how good it was. So I read it. I was able to finish it because I was just starting to go into labor at 2:34 am with my baby boy and knew I had a lot of time to kill until the morning. The girl wore a hat on the cover too, actually it was more like a bonnet. It was called, "When the Heart Cries." And (sorry to disappoint you) it wasn't as bad or corny as I thought it would be. Just really slow and frustrating, just as you would imagine any Amish love story would be.
Gee thanks for the book ideas! I'll get started ;)
PS I woke dad up laughing so loud (he had gone to bed early). He hollered, "Knock it off!"
Alisha, you in the hat, really wins the comedic prize here. It must be nice to be married and comfortable (trying hard to join the family with backhanded compliments).
Nicole, I believe you succeeded with the parenthesis.
Alisha,
A. I am flattered you still wear the high waisted apron I gave you from switzerland!
B. Your book is the definately the only one I would read. David Sedaris-eque.
C. I thin the cousins' book borders on incestuous.
Post a Comment