Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Reader's Rant: Keep It Covered
Tomorrow I am going to have a baby. (Round of applause.) But I shall not leave you comfortless. Enjoy this Rant and for some of my more delicate readers, I'm sorry about the photos. Really sorry.
Dear Alisha,
Put an end to this, please!
Dear ladies,
DO NOT hold a maternity photo session. It's the definition of awkward. There is no way to make it beautiful or artistic or anything other than creepy. I'm happy to celebrate the arrival of your bundle of joy - heck, I'll throw a shower in your honor and bring home cooked meals after your angel arrives- just please, PLEASE do not force me to look at your stretch marks, love handles, or popped-out belly button.
Sincerely, Keep It Covered
I only have these photos to offer in reply. All except the last two are from Awkwardfamilyphotos.com . The last two photos may not be copied or reproduced with out permission, and I will not give permission.
(This one's my favorite. Who came up with this idea? Even the mother looks uncomfortable.)
This is like in Highlights magazine where they ask "how many things how many things can you find wrong with this picture? (Those things on my belly are suppose to be pigtails.) Answers at the bottom of the page.
The End.
1)Grown women should never wear pigtails except for costume/humorous purposes. 2)Not covered. 3)Unsuitable reading material for infant brain development. 4)Unhealthy projection of mother onto child. 5) Chair should not be placed floating in bedroom.
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11 comments:
i totally, 100% agree with Keep It Covered!
i have a friend who just had a baby and she posted some pregnant photos on FB...yuck! SO WEIRD and just plain ewwww (i really don't know how to describe them, i just wish i would have never laid eyes on them)!!
if you HAVE TO take them, keep it private, don't show them to anyone! gross.
OH MY GOSH!!! My sister in law posted pictures on fb last week of her pregnancy photo shoot...UGH! All she was wearing was jeans and a strapless bra. I was so embarrassed for her. It was just so not right. I could tell that she wanted us to comment on it but all I could think to say was "EEEWWW. WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!" Please keep it covered people! No one wants to see it.
Hahahaha! I've been trying really hard not to comment (I always feel silly after I click publish) but both me and my husband had a pretty good laugh from this post so I couldn't resist!
I personally wouldn't want to live in a world without the occasional belly shot. I think some are hilarious, some are touching, some are refreshingly creative, and the ones revealing the battle wounds show a kind of confidence I wish I had. The human body is AMAZING and beautiful... not always sexy, but daaang Alisha! Look at your perfect preggo belly!! In that last picture all you need is a plaid skirt and... you would have some pretty confused male readers ;)
ps. Good luck today! Can't wait to see pics and find out what you named her!!
bwahahahaha! I read this while brushing my teeth and nearly spewed toothpaste all over the mirror laughing when I scrolled down to the last two pics! I so agree with you. I don't get the obsession with all the bare belly prego pics. A covered belly is beautiful and feminine and all, but the bare belly pics just seem so low class.
There are a lot of tasteless and awkward bare belly shots (you only scratched the surface with your examples). But I do think that there is an artistic way to do it -- very few photographers can pull it off. For example: http://www.time.com/time/covers/0,16641,20101004,00.html
Sure it's not one I would post in my living room, but it's a cool shot. I think americans make bare skin too taboo and are overly sensitive about it.
I remember you talking about setting up these shots waiting for your belly to grow big enough. You did not disappoint. I am floored by the pigtail photo, and by floored I mean on the floor laughing.
I don't feel strongly about pregnancy photos of other people. I prefer the ones where the belly is covered, and I certainly didn't feel like having a professional photo shoot when I was preggo. I only took photos to document the growth of the pregnancy.
That Time cover IS really cool, Ksenia! And no more inappropriate than the part in The Little Mermaid where she is getting her human legs. Still, if that were a picture of me I probably wouldn't have the guts to post it on FB. But if one of my friends did I would think, "What a beautiful and artistic shot! A lot of girls are going to get their panties in a ruffle about this. She is brave for posting. I think I hate her a little bit more than I did yesterday :p"
Haha, but I seriously think that Alisha's rant response was the most perfect way she could have responded. People are funny :)
Awesome! Those awkward pictures have haunted me forevuh. So gross with everyone touching the belly, too.
So funny, the floating chair. So wrong, just there with nothing to do but sit.....
Agreed, keep it covered. Even if you do somehow look like a Victoria Secret Model and a fake baby bump, I still don't want to see it because I am jealous!
A friend enjoys close to naked shots of herself pregnant along with her shirtless husband in them as well. Then she puts them on blog/facebook/hangs them all over her house. I do think there are some tasteful belly shots, but then there's others that should be kept private. Looking at close to naked pictures of friends/family is slightly uncomfortable - no matter the ability of the photographer.
The lady in the tree picture is awesome. Awkward shot and weird. Why is she in a tree?
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