Dear Alisha,
I've been to your home a few times and it's always so clean! Sure you may complain it gets messy at times, but my bet is there are never any pee stains garnishing the toilet's undercarriage or food bits speckled on the cabinets. How much time do you put into cleaning per week? Do you make your children do any cleaning?
Sincerely,
Mrs. Envington
Dear Mrs. Envington,
Ah, I'm glad the illusion has worked. Of course my house gets messy and reeks of pee (boys bathroom only) at times. I am only human. To answer how much time I spend cleaning, I don't know. It's all I think about and it is my constant goal To Get This House Cleaned Up! Or, To Keep the House Clean!! With three small children, it is impossible.
A Sordid Past
If you have known me for long, you know I am a sloppy person. Now I know many say that, but really, I am very messy. In grade school I always had the messiest desk. I often had to sit out recess to clean it up when my teacher would become so frustrated over me losing all my homework assignments. In High School I vowed to turn over a fresh clean leaf but it didn't last long. Quickly my locker would become so messy that at one point I realized the funny smell in the hall was coming from MY locker. Only now I was older and was too embarrassed to clean it out in front of everyone so I just started avoiding my locker. Then I snuck in late after school one day, cleaned it out, and discovered that the funny smell was a combination of a rotten orange and moldy bread. Why did I ever bring my lunch that day!!? I had a similar problem the next year only I never cleaned out my locker but left it for the janitors to throw away the entire contents at the end of the year.
1. Clean As You Go
So it is with this background that I give you advice. It has taken me a lot of work to have a respectable, often clean house. I have heard of all sorts of different systems out there for organizing your cleaning down to the most minute detail, but here is what it boils down to: you have to clean as you go. And you have to dedicate some time to more deep cleaning each week. Maybe if you are single and childless can you get away with living sloppy and catching up on the weekends, but then you are still spending most of you time in a messy home.
2. Family Style
Once you have a child, you have to consistently clean as you go. Once your children are old enough to help out, you need to teach them to clean up after themselves if you want to have any kind of life at all. I am not perfect at this since I am also impatient. My oldest, age 8, makes his bed, sort of cleans his room, vacuums the house, and occasionally sets the table, takes out the trash or helps otherwise. I am motivated by the idea of raising a responsible man who will help clean up and won't think of his wife as his housekeeper.
3. Use a Housekeeper, If You Can
Lastly, I have a housekeeper. Save your gasping and let me explain. She only comes once every 2 weeks. It started when I was pregnant and had vertigo and could get nothing done. I kept it up through my pregnancy and after the baby was born.. and now. Here is how I justify the expense: I can enjoy my house when it is clean. It keeps the peace. On a Saturday when Justin wants to take the boys to the zoo and I want to scream "WHAT ABOUT THE MESSY BATHROOMS YOU JERKS!!" I can stop and realize that they will be cleaned, soon, and not by me. It is also the only way I can seem to have the entire house clean at once.
I still clean a ton. I put everything away before she gets here and dust or tidy after she leaves. Every mother knows that even a sparkling clean house will not last long with out maintenance. I light clean the bathroom and floors and everything else inbetween visits. . Of all my monthly bills, this is one of the lowest yet brings me the most joy. At first I had a hard time paying for something I was capable of doing myself. Only, am I really capable? Was the house entirely cleaned on a regular basis? I am telling you this in case you have a pig for a husband who says things like 'how come Alisha has 3 kids and can keep her house clean and you can't'? (Said in a stupid voice, of course.) I have a housekeeper, that's how.
The Damning Evidence
It was suggested that I show you a picture of my house messy to make you all feel better. The only problem is that I never think "hey! My house looks like trash! Let me take a picture!!" But then there's my downfall. My bathroom. It is almost always a mess and I have no one but myself and Justin to blame. I can't seem to manage my time so that I can get myself ready with time enough to spare to tidy the bathroom afterwards. It only takes 2 mornings to go from sparking to this:
I hope you are all feeling better.
I have several friends who swear by Flylady.com
What do you guys think of the fancy way this post looks? Justin organized /jazzed up my content. Do you like? Does it look too slick and you miss the mish-mash I usually come up with? Or is this way better?
14 comments:
haha, "Mrs. Envington". I'm guessing this was written by Kleaver Ksenia, who by the way almost always has a mostly clean house... or at least to my standards. I think she actually makes her bed every single day! Weird.
One day when I'm rich, the first thing I will buy is a live in housekeeper. One like Mrs. Garrett from Diff'rent Strokes or Nell from Gimme a Break. I'm pretty sure that would solve every single problem in my life. Not even exaggerating.
Great looking post! You guys make a good team. Of course the thing that keeps us coming back for more are your answers so, either way.
I should add that I've only seen Ksenia's house either mostly clean or clean so maybe it's not Ksenia... If not- sorry dude.
yes, I like how Justin worked his magic.
As for clean.... It is always a battle I fight. (Usually a loosing battle!)
But I find as I give the kids more resposibility, I don't feel so overwhelmed and for the most part I can stay on top of things.
And as you said, someday they will have the skills to keep their own homes clean. (Hopefully)
A friend and I had a vigorous argument about the ethics of a housekeeper's help. I was decidedly against the idea - it was immoral, I shouted from the top of my (cobwebbed, dusty) rooftop.
UNTIL ... ONE DAY ... my sister paid for someone to come deep clean the house during my last week of pregnancy. Gross confession follows: ... (it took her an entire HOUR to clean our richly bacterial-flora-laden shower). She did a sparkling job with the whole house and I have since repented of my former views and look forward to seeing Luda again in a couple weeks. How could I have been so unenlightened???
I would happily eat beans for every meal in order to save enough money for the luxury of a regular housekeeper. And I really like Awesome's idea of a LIVE IN housekeeper. And a cook. And a Jeeves.
I did not post this question, but it totally could have been me. I'm definitely "clean as you go" challenged, and leave myself more of a mess than anyone in the house does. Although, they're not great at it either. To further compound my cleanliness problems is that I work full time and own a shedding dog. Flylady was a life saver for me when I was a stay at home mom, but now that I'm working, I'm at a loss. Saturdays are taken up by laundry and floors and everything else, and it's still never really clean around here. Guess I'll have to add a housekeeper to my budget. My mom always had one...(maybe that's the root of my issues?)
Great post! I love the pictures and advice. Cleaning the house is a great and never-ending task. Since I am home most the time, I have to keep my house clean or else I go crazy. I feel when it comes to deep-cleaning I have gotten much faster at cleaning the bathrooms, baseboards, etc.. because it is usually done during nap time and the faster I get it done the quicker I can start MY time. But truly by the time I am finished with my tasks for the day I usually only have about 15 min. to myself, which isn't enough. Maybe a housekeeper isn't such a bad idea. I wonder how much cleaner my house would really get. I'd love to experiment.
Since Alisha lived with my husband and I for a semester in collage while she was engaged I can testify to her messy habits!! So as a mother of 3 (2 of them being 3yr olds) It's comforting to know that my seamingly now perfect niece has not become a stepford wife after all. I've never been a neet freek myself, my mother would have jumped for joy if she ever saw my bed made. Granted the covers are never on the floor either. I would call it, always in a semi-made state. There are some aspects of a clean house that I think are more important than others. One when you walk into your home how does it smell!!! You may have the kids toys on the floor but the way your home smells is the first impression! I think everyone probably has certain cleaning issues, mine is 1. smell, 2, dishes sitting around the kitchen dining area with bits of food left on them. I hate doing dishes probably more than most but at least rinse them when you leave them in the sink. 3, dirty floors, a few scatered toys aside sweep, spot mop, rent a carpet shampooer if you can't spend more on a pro. 4, NO PEE SHOULD EVER ESCAPE THE INSIDE OF THE TOILET!!!! My husband well knows that when my son gets big enough to stand by the toilet he will teach him to aim or he will clean it himself!!!!! Teaching your spouse and children to help can be like pulling wisdom teeth! My 10 1/2 yr old has always acted like she was raised with servants but they have to learn sooner than later and it makes for a much happier Mom. By the way to "Mrs. Envingtion" since Alisha's Maiden name is Ethington, I suspect it is a relitive how wrote the letter, you might consider being more creative in the fake names you choose!
No, I didn't write the letter, but I'm glad whoever did -- did.
I too feel ambivalent about a house keeper, as if it would hurt my pride. But I so clearly see a benefit in having one! Plus, I do not think one has to be "rich" or even "wealthy" to hire one of these professionals.
We've had a housekeeper for two years and it's the best money we've ever spent. As we saw it, there were only three options after we had kids: messy house/happy kids/fried parents, clean house/unhappy kids/fried parents, or hire a housekeeper/happy kids/happy parents.
Not to blow your mind, but our housekeeper comes for two hours three nights each week to do our dishes and tidy up AND she comes every other Saturday for five hours to deep clean. And still our house is a light mess at the end of each day because of the kids. But our weekends are free and we wake up to a clean kitchen most of the time. What more could you want in life?
Everton, Ethington, both cute and clever plays on Envington. Life is just too short to not tease Ksenia whenever possible (she's Ukrainian).
"messy house/happy kids/fried parents, clean house/unhappy kids/fried parents" So true! It's strangely empowering to see how common it is for people to have housekeepers. Time to brake out the beans.
I am very proud of you for getting a housekeeper! I think it is one of the best things you can do for yourself. More women should have one.
I used to clean houses with a professional company during college to make ends meet, and I can tell you- we left the houses super clean and super gorgeous.
And 15 bucks an hour is CHEAP! 15years ago we charged 20 an hour. So, you score.
And you are right on with having the kids help out. My kids know exactly what is expected/level of clean and yes I pay them to do jobs--it has eliminated all the nagging and fussing.
Now when I say "Who wants to fold this mountain of laundry?" or "I am offering dishes for three points tonight" they JUMP at the chance. And if one of them doesn't get to do it, they COMPLAIN! "He got to do dishes last night!"
we have a housekeeper, she comes every other wednesday, i love it. our biggest challenge is dog hair...hate it.
i don't mind cleaning but i dread any kind of organizing that has to be done, it requires thought and i tend to get grand ideas and over-complicate things and turn what should be an hour project into a week-long project that never gets completed. and then i am more or less back where i started and the cycle continues.
however, i am happy to report that i did clean/organize my closet this weekend and even put in new shelves , etc. to accommodate my jewelry collection which has been slowly taking over my bathroom counter as well as some new shoes that needed a home. and 5 days later it is STILL clean and organized!
I have very little time to clean my house so if you stop over uninvited do no judge. If you tell me you are coming I will make an effort. I would love to have a housekeeper, but I know that I will never get one. A friend of mine said the other day
"Cleaning you house with kids around is like trying to brush your teeth while eating an oreo" and quite frankly I have to agree. My day begins at 3:30 am and then consits of exercise, getting ready, a 10 hour work day, home to make dinner, get the kids fed and ready for bed. By that time I am exhausted and don't care if the toys are all over and the dishes are in the sink or the laundry is piled up. I will get to it at some point. The one thing that I can't stand though is dirty floors and it is the one thing that I just hate to do. It takes up a lot of time.
Oh, my, oh, my. . . On my to do list for 2010 (I've decided to chuck all the other ideas based on this enlightening post):
1) Hire a housekeeper—regularly!
2) Hire a babysitter to watch the kids for me to do the non-housekeeper duties to get my house completely in order (finally, finally, finally!)
3) Give each of the people who have posted on this blog a huge HUG for being honest and providing a realistic view oh how we all are in the same boat (I've just decided to upgrade my row boat from one set of oars to an extra set of oars in order to make more progress)
4) Start eating vegetables, or maybe keep NOT eating vegetables, which should save some money, right? ;-)
5) Go enjoy my life more, cause I'm feeling like the "girl in the bubble" from all my efforts cleaning this stinkin' house only to feel day after day defeated. It is seriously like building a tower with blocks and having someone coming by to knock it down after each attempt to rebuild, oh, and then laughing about it!
So, here's to 2010: The Year of "Cleaning" Enlightenment!!
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