Monday, June 21, 2010

Small Ears

Funny cat posters get me every time!

Dear Alisha,

I have a friend who is constantly giving me her calendar, i.e. I'm doing this and this and this (never anything particularly interesting, just routine stuff). And she tells me crap like, just wait until your kids are older, life gets ten times crazier than it was when they were little. It annoys me to no end. She seems to act stressed out over the slightest thing, it requires major planning to do anything with her beforehand.

Am I the only one who is unimpressed with people who are "too busy"? I don't want to hear the full itinerary, I just want to have a decent, fun conversation with people.


Sincerely,

small ears


Dear Small Ears,

How do you think I feel? Don't you think I have better things to do than to hear you complain about your friends? I mean, having 3 small boys really keeps me plenty busy. Just getting them dressed and groomed in the morning is a sweaty wrestling match. Then there's the day in and day out picking-up-after and cleaning. Laundry! Don't even get me started on laundry! My baby still wakes up most nights around 4am....

Okay, here's the beautiful thing about friends: you pick them. You don't necessarily have to keep them in your life. If you can not steer the conversation to more pleasant topics and you don't find your time with her rewarding, drop her like she's hot. Don't go do something crazy like disowning her, just don't make an effort to spend time with her any more.


I think we are all ready to move on to more important issues...

(Stay tuned for a post on knock-off shoes!)

7 comments:

megan said...

people talk about what they know, and it sounds like her friend only knows the routine, day to day stuff. It definitely gets boring to listen to, heck it gets boring to do! I'm sure if she has some new things to do it would ease her out of the boring calendar talk. It's true, you can just stop putting forth the effort to hang out with her. Honestly, that is probably what I would do too. You could also try to do something out of the ordinary and include her. Set up a movie night with just the girls i.e. we are going to see Eclipse at midnight with about 20 ladies, which I know is not for everyone, but it's fun! Don't ask for her input just assign a time and place and invite a few people. If she can't make it, then she can't make it, if she can, great! oh and do the inviting over email (it's not formal to go see a movie) so that way she will reply back with an email instead of talking your ear off about the lame stuff

Janalee said...

I don't get the whole 'Small Ears' tie-in. small because you don't want to hear anymore?

I liked your answer Alisha.

So busy! - always a pet peeve. I'll indulge only the closest friends of my busy-ness. And they like it.

Pj said...

Dear Small Ears,
Please send your "busy" friend my contact information. I guarantee I can make her feel much better. All she needs to hear is someone who has a busier schedule than hers- and with 11 kids at home, I'll have her beat 365 days a year.
She just needs a little shake down.

Anonymous said...

Alisha,
The "chatty" friend, is probably looking for some motivation and support to handle her role as a mother, but doesn't know how to correctly ask for it. My friends and I were in this same predicament a couple of years ago, so we all went to a time management class. It worked wonders. We choose what we want to shuffle to and from. Trying to wean your friend off by not giving her attention, may give her some self-esteem issues. I'd be careful on how to navigate this situation.
You may be doing more harm than good.

Michelle said...

I feel your pain. Barrack's always telling me George caused this, George caused that. George, George, George...He's driving me nuts!

Judy Ethington said...

LOL I want to get to know this Michelle. Another alternative is to converse by email with your friend. Then she can say what she wants and you can SKIM.

Rhodes Trip said...

Now, what was the question again? I'm still laughing at the "drop her like she's hot" portion of the response (of course sing-songing it in my head to Snoop's original chart topper—cause you know how I roll). . . good stuff, good stuff ;-)